A Door of Hope

 When you are on a budget, and you cannot eat out anywhere in your city your holidays tend to take a different form than what "normal" people seem to do. And I like it that way. This year we celebrated our Valentines Day by building a grown up fort in our living room, complete with Christmas lights we hadn't put away yet:). Our Dakota dog was under the impression that we built the fort with only her in mind. She slept under it for the next three nights. I hated to take it down because she loved it so much... and lets be honest, so did I.

I have learned that real love looks a lot different than what you see on the movie screens.

Over the years David and I are finally starting to learn and understand one another's love languages. I feel loved when I am given gifts, and am written sweet notes. I love surprises, and I love to give gifts too. David's love language is quality time and acts of service. He feels so loved when we can sit by one another and read a book, or when I take the time to clean the house and load the dishwasher.

Last Thursday David surprised me with a beautiful pot of my favorite flowers, and a sweet note. On the front it said, "I love you in a kissy kissy kind of way". So cute.

And when I returned home from work we spent time together building our fort, eating a snack, and talking about our days. I ran out of the house to rent us a Red Box movie and to grab a few surprises for the night.

When I came home David and Dakota were tucked away in the fort, just waiting for me to cuddle.

But then it happened. My stomach started to hurt, and I started to get chills. I knew what was coming, and there was no way I could prevent it from taking over my body and ruining our night. It crept up slowly, but sent me into shock quickly. Somewhere in that little snack we ate a few hours earlier, gluten had found it's way into my tummy.. and made all kinds of havoc.

I left the fort and several minutes later David found me curled up in a ball on our bathroom floor, crying. I was crying because I was in so much pain, but also because I knew I had ruined our night together (it was only 5:30pm at this point). David had taken the night off of studying to be with me. And I was ashamed that my sickness had messed up another beautiful night.

Ever so gently, he carried me (still curled up in a ball) to our bed, and rubbed my back as I continually had to lean over the garbage can. He continually reassured me that he was not mad that this had happened, and that he loved me.

And in those moments I was reminded what true love was.

Although I was in pain, and I wish every moment of that night hadn't happened the way it did, I was so thankful. Thankful that God has blessed me with a man who loves me when I am weak, loves me when I cannot stand on my own, and continues to love me in the valleys of life.

In David's tender care for me I was reminded of my Father's love.. never changing, always constant, and always full of grace.

No, love does not look like a fairytale ending, and it seldom looks like what you think it should. But, as I laid there in bed with tears falling down my face and a garbage can below my head, my sweet and compassionate husband's tender care was a tangible way God was showing me His love.

" Therefore I will allure her, and bring her into the wilderness, and speak tenderly to her. And there I will give her her vineyards and make the Valley of Trouble a door of hope. And there she shall answer as in the days of her youth."